What if CMPivot changed to a client notification methodology. Send the CMPivot "Question" to each client, and let the client answer with its results with randomization. Afterward, the CMPivot query would record its last run time and cache the results for a period of time, which would be visible in the console. Moving to a notification style procedure would avoid waiting for synchronous CMPivot (Slow) results and allow for distributed processing (Fast).